April 15, 2009

One hour at a time

time I’m at a time in my life when I am faced again with living in the moment. I literally have to mark my life one hour at a time. I am having trouble sleeping at night. I don’t feel afraid, just leery of closing my eyes. I hate this.

The time passes slowly, when I wish it would fly. When I’d like it to slow down, it moves too quickly. It’s my Catch 24 right now.

I’m sure it sounds like I’m talking in riddles. Those closest to me that read this will know exactly what I’m talking about. I dread the coming months. I dread the endless sleepless nights. Before it’s over with, I may be spending many nights away from home. I don’t know how else I will make it through this.

Have you ever lived like this? Has your life ever been disturbed in such a way that very little feels stable? I’m so thankful that my God never changes. That is the single shred of hope I have to hold on to right now.